2016白宫记者晚宴，来看看国际著名段子手都说了啥

当地时间2016年4月30日,（即美国东部时间Eastern Time）美国华盛顿希尔顿酒店，作为美国现任总统的奥巴马进行了他任期内最后一次白宫记者晚宴演讲。作为国际著名段子手，33分钟的演讲被说成了单口相声，全程高能，黑人和自黑不断，留学君隔着屏幕都感受到了他体内的洪荒之力呢，来看看他到底说了啥英语段子吧！

1、I know I was a little late tonight. I was running on CpT, which stands for jokes that white people should not make.

我知道我来的有点晚了。没办法，我们用的是CpT时间。这可是白人不能讲的笑话哦。

CpT的全称是“Colored people's Time”，即有色人种时间，这个带有种族偏见的说法讽刺黑人总是迟到。为什么奥巴马会用这个梗呢？因为4月初纽约市长在参加一个活动时用Cp Time来解释自己的迟到，但这个带有强烈种族主义色彩的玩笑引起了观众的不满。当时也在台上的希拉里给他打圆场说，他说的其实是Cautious politician Time，谨慎的政客们用的时间。事后，希拉里和市长都被媒体狠批了一顿。

所以奥巴马委婉地对希拉里和白思豪提出了批评，说CpT真正的意思是“白人不应该说的那一类笑话”。

2、 Anyway, here we are. My eighth and final appearance at this unique event. And I am excited. If this material works well, I’m going to use it at Goldman Sachs next year. Earn me some serious Tubmans. That’s right.

高盛梗是指前阵子美国网站上流传的一篇所谓希拉里在高盛的演讲，虽然这篇演讲是洋葱式恶搞，但是却有很多人当真了。

Tubmans这里指钱，因为而Tubmans则是曾经反抗奴隶制度的非裔女英雄哈里特塔布曼(Harriet Tubman)，上周美国财政部刚刚宣布把她的头像印在新版的20美元纸币上。

3、 So time passes. In just six short months, I will be officially a lame duck, which means Congress now will flat out reject my authority. And Republican leaders won’t take my phone calls. And this is going to take some getting used to, it’s really going to — it’s a curve ball. I don’t know what to do with it.

自黑小能手，说自己快卸任了，所有人都拿他不当回事了。

巴马在演讲中也提到I will be officially a lame duck。Lame duck跛脚鸭，无用的人。在美国三俗动画片SOUTH pARK《南方公园》中有几集巴马就是以鸭子的形象出现的。

4.And yet, somehow, despite all this, despite the churn, in my final year, my approval ratings keep going up. The last time I was this high, I was trying to decide on my major.

奥巴马承认自己大学时候抽过大麻，这里玩的是这个梗，high在这里是双关，major是大学的专业。

5.Although I am a little hurt that he’s not here tonight. We had so much fun the last time. And it is surprising. You’ve got a room full of reporters, celebrities, cameras, and he says no? Is this dinner too tacky for The Donald? What could he possibly be doing instead? Is he at home, eating a Trump Steak — tweeting out insults to Angela Merkel? What’s he doing?

黑了自己当然还要吐槽别人，吐槽的最多的当属川普了。

奥巴马说有这么多记者，名人，川普都没来，实在不符合他的行事风格，吐槽他爱出风头。除此外还吐槽川普喜欢以自己的名字命名他的产品，他用Trump命名了一款自己的牛排产品为Trump Steak，而且开发的地产项目也往往用Trump命名。

6、It has been an honor and a privilege to work side by side with you to strengthen our democracy. With that I just have two more words to say: Obama out. [puts two fingers to his lips. Drops mic].

和你们并肩为我们的民主而奋斗是我无上的荣耀。现在我只想在多说三个字：马上走！说完之后把麦丢掉就大步流星的下台了，简直自带鼓风机。

这里致敬了科比退役时大喊Mamba out然后丢麦的动作。

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